The Cor Lucis Blog

Read My Letter to God

Posted by on May 6, 2013 in Blog | 0 comments

Read My Letter to God

I wrote this one a number of years ago and it got picked up in an anthology. Hopefully you will still find it relevant.The following has been reprinted with the expressed permission of Beyond Borders Press 2002 from The World Healing Book.

Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.

A Letter to God

Forgive me father for I have sinned. As you know my two-year old daughter has had a bit of a cold the last few days and has developed a cough. I usually have to hold her upside down while her body flails and grunts in protest to successfully give her medicine. Last night was no exception. Her tiny legs furiously kicking, trying to stop the medicine from making it to her mouth. Oddly, she never realizes that this will make her feel better.

To Whom it May Concern

Dear God or to whom it may concern-After I was convinced the purple syrup with the fake-grape flavor was in her stomach I put her right side up. Her tiny sneakers hit the floor with a squeak as she wrestled away from my grip. Normally she would run away looking for the crayons that would help make her next masterwork on my living room wall but not this night. Tonight, she looked up at me angrily, stumbled to the couch and like an old pro vomited all over it. It was a sticky mixture of decomposing orange juice and cough syrup, certainly a dangerous combination to upholstered furniture. I scooped her up as quickly as I could, running down the hall to the safest haven for this kind of disaster, the bathroom. By the time we arrived at the white tile sanctuary, I was grateful that my daughter was fine but the damage had been done. The couch, my handmade sweater, my pants, her favorite overalls with Winnie the Pooh on them and a shelf of my collection of book club edition James Bond books all splashed, not to mention the floors of the living room, hallway and bathroom were a sticky mess.

I Am Angry

Truthfully I was angry, I wanted to punish and scold her. I knew she didn’t really do it on purpose but I still wanted to blame her. Would it do her or me any good? What I decided to do was to hold her and comfort her. I needed to give my compassion to my sick little girl. I then did the only thing I could do…clean up the mess. As I got out a mop and started cleaning I still considered blaming and resenting my child as well as all the other little two-year olds for all the messes they may or may not make in the future but that would be silly.

And I Am Sad

Today I find myself with uncertainty about the future due to the tragedy and societal upheaval that surrounds me. I mourn with the millions of people throughout the world who live with this same uncertainty and upheaval. I am angry, I want to punish and scold. I want to lay blame and hold on to resentments but in my heart I know it won’t do the world or me any good. I can only hold my own actions accountable. I may only honor the lives lost and the challenges that lie ahead by living my own life as if it has meaning, that decisions I make matter. This is why I choose to put goodness into the world when I am given the choice. I always am given that choice. I will continue to offer love and compassion to my fellow man. For me to be of service to those who need my help. My sin is my refusal to change. My refusal to adhere to the chaos that seems to be everywhere and so overwhelming. I will pray and meditate and ask for strength in times of weakness. I can not pretend I have all the answers nor the understanding of why things happen the way they do but I will get a mop when it is time to clean-up.

Questions, comments and hate mail are strongly encouraged. By the way these thoughts do not necessarily reflect the ideals of Cor Lucis as a whole or its members… but they might.

Love is the law, love under will.

Pretending I Know

Posted by on Mar 20, 2013 in Blog | 2 comments

Pretending I Know

When I was a kid, my dad used to ask me the most annoying question ever. I’d ask him for help with a problem– math, science, boys, whatever, and he’d give me this look, like he was like some sort of sage on high. You know the look: pursed lips, furrowed brow, fingers templed in front of him. He’d take a slow, deep breath (or five, which was really annoying when I was trying to get my homework done) and then say,

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Leviathan in my Closet and Getting Initiated

Posted by on Jan 6, 2013 in Blog | 0 comments

Leviathan in my Closet and Getting Initiated

Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.

Yes I can recall that cold blustery evening, the night I decided to claim my magical right, claim the power I knew resided inside of me. (more…)

Leviathan in My Closet and Getting Initiated, part 2

Posted by on Jan 6, 2013 in Blog | 0 comments

Leviathan in My Closet and Getting Initiated, part 2

In the blink of an eye I knew, This is a big mistake. All of a sudden I knew I was in over my head. I knew Leviathan couldn’t fit in this tiny closet, especially with me already in it, but it was too late. I felt a wave of fear crash over me like I had never have, before or since. The fear was immense and profound. There were no voices or shadows. No howling wind. All the hangers stood still, even the one that held the macramé sweater vest. I was alone and lost inside a tiny room. The fear wasn’t subsiding, it was escalating, as the anticipation of my pending ass whooping from the ether loomed larger. My heart pounded, as I felt increasingly more helpless in this bizarre situation of my own making. (more…)

The Break Up: Thelema Style

Posted by on Dec 28, 2012 in Blog | 2 comments

The Break Up: Thelema Style

The Break Up: Thelema Style is a mildly updated version of a previously published story, which was one of my first essays I have ever written about my experience of… well… breaking up. As Cor Lucis updates this site, we will be presenting some of our older material during the reorganization. Now sit back and enjoy my misery. –MO–

Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.

Lady Thelemites, Please Accept My Apology

Forgive me, Nuit. Have pity on me, Isis and Aphrodite. Valued female Thelemites, please cover your eyes for the next half paragraph while I (more…)

Thelema Xmas Dinner

Posted by on Dec 21, 2012 in Blog | 3 comments

Thelema Xmas Dinner

Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.

This story is a mildly updated version originally called the Recipe, which was written many moons ago. These reruns are coming because of the new Cor Lucis web site and its new internal structure. Enjoy this timely holiday classic about a Thelema Xmas.

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How I Became the Black Magician

Posted by on Dec 14, 2012 in Blog | 1 comment

How I Became the Black Magician

Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.

How I Became the Black Magician is a mildly updated version of the Outing, which was one of my first essays I have ever written about my experience as a Thelemite.

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Magick and Life

Posted by on Dec 11, 2012 in Blog | 2 comments

Magick and Life

Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.

Magick Memories

From as far back as I can possibly remember I have been fascinated with the idea of Magick. I remember at a young age reading Siddhartha by Hermann Hesse and I think that’s where it started. I would wander through the forest behind my house to a beautiful river and I would visualize the ferryman coming in his boat to take me away to a distant world. I would imagine spirits living
beneath the surface of the water and I would talk to them and ask them questions about life. (more…)

The Tree of Life and Thelema

Posted by on Dec 7, 2012 in Blog | 2 comments

The Tree of Life and Thelema

Cor Lucis has successfully used the Gra Tree of Life frame as the basis of its initiatory process for almost a decade. I want to tell you a little about the Gra Tree, because I love it. Before I do, there is a little pesky history to share first. (more…)

The Gra Tree: A New Perspective on the Tree of Life

Posted by on Dec 1, 2012 in Blog | 6 comments

The Gra Tree:  A New Perspective on the Tree of Life

For over eight years, Cor Lucis has been working on refining our initiatory program. It’s an experiment that we’ve embarked upon which I consider not only fruitful but actually inspiring. Here are the details: (more…)